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Synastry Tips
Here are a few equations:
1 person with unmanaged issues + 1 person with managed issues = 1 unfulfilling relationship
1 person with unmanaged issues + 1 person with unmanaged issues = 1 unfulfilling relationship
1 person with managed issues + 1 person with managed issues = 1 fulfilling relationship
Forget the astrology for a second. If you are trying to make things work with someone who is a pain in the ass all the time, who is sensitive over just anything, who has trust issues, etc., it makes things very, very difficult. What you don’t want in a relationship is an ongoing fight to make it work. You don’t want endless hassles.
I was in a short relationship with someone years ago who cursed me out because when I went supermarket shopping, it took 45 minutes instead of 20 minutes. I was then accused of having sex with every woman within reach. Guess what I did? I said, “You cook. See ya!” In yet another situation, I was driving some 800 miles, one way, twice a month (in between doing music for a TV show) or so, only to be accused again of having a relationship at home. Why would anyone drive that far if they didn’t care? It’s silly and maddening. No one can have a relationship with insecurity and be fulfilled.
How do we spot these kinds of things in a horoscope? Go right to that 2nd House. If planets in the 2nd House or the ruler are involved in tension, that’s your first queue. Then, look at the ruler of the 1st House. If that is retrograde or involved in tension, you have a “live one.” The third check is to look and see if there is parental tension shown in the horoscope because if there is, you know where the insecurity and identity issues come from. Then lastly, look at the 7th House because that is usually where all these issues dump themselves in adult life. If that also is challenged, you have a great candidate for the kinds of issues and insecurities that make relationships more challenging than they need to be.
When a person has issues that are not controlled, it doesn’t matter what the synastry is about. Nothing in astrology will help that situation except that person getting their issues managed. Many, many, many relationships last a long time with one or both people being unfulfilled. They acquiesce to it and are just content to live for the moments when things are not stressful, usually because there is something that is a by-product of the relationship that is advantageous, especially if one person is unemployed or barely employed and the other is paying almost all of the bills.
The goal is to have this equation:
1 fulfilled person + 1 fulfilled person = 1 fulfilled couple
If it isn’t a win-win situation, both people lose!